In Dating

“The most important thing is having a quality picture.”

Millions of people give online dating a whirl on a regular basis. What makes you stand out in the crowd? To get the dynamics of your profile right, you don’t have to be a creative copywriter; (although that may help) or a successful salesperson with a convincing sales history. All you have to do is to tailor your profile to reflect just that. However, be warned, it might not be as easy as you think so here is a heads up.

Picture Perfect

Evan Katz, author of I Can’t Believe I’m Buying This Book – a Commonsense Guide to Successful Internet Dating, says, “The most important thing is having a quality picture. It sort of goes without saying. You’re not even going to bother reading someone’s profile if you don’t find them attractive.” Katz, suggests treating your photo like the title of your college application essay. Look around to see what kind of picture catches your eye and what kind of messages and mood your photographs convey, and then make the right choice.

Get the Right Kind of Attention

A good username is similar to the bait used in a good catch. Make sure that your nickname expresses something about you, such as an abiding passion or a characteristic you value. Remember, the aim is not, to sum up your requirements in a phrase, it is to attract her interest. So make sure the first thing online she notices about you are a combination of wit, intelligence, and values.

Be Attractive, Not a Braggart

The vilest online personas are like obnoxious Reality stars. There might be some talent there, but it is buried so far beneath the showing off, that all you see and hear is just false. So instead of bragging, let people know what makes you so wonderful. That will show your accomplishments better than any grandiose CV.

Selective Information

Face it, potential online partners want to know the important stuff first. Such as, if you can do a long-distance relationship, if you are vigorously religious, or if you have kids. Your philosophy of life, unless it includes something startling like polygamy, can wait until you are at the email or talking on the phone stage. Put the essentials out there as a selection process for the suitable, and to make the unsuitable run far away.

Match What You Want to Your Own Profile

Even if you are looking for a soul mate, life partner, best friend, or date it might be wise to keep that to yourself for some time. Any variation on the following is silly or excessive, and ultimately fruitless, so avoid “looking for a wife/ mother of my children/ keep me enthralled/ make me laugh.” You need to tailor your own description to match the kind of person you are looking for. Never make the mistake of trying to be everything to every person. You will attract people as vague and personality-free as your profile.

Show, Rather than Tell

Do not tell readers that you are, like, totally into cheesy TV series, or that you are a blast, or that you love cats, or that are really fun. Go beyond the obvious, laundry list-type writing. Show who you are through your writing by using clever references or talking about a specific activity that involves your cats, or how often you go to salsa dance classes.

Spell Right

Presuming you aren’t actually looking for someone from writers club, you want someone semi-literate. So don’t insult other users or devalue yourself with bad spelling, incomprehensible acronyms, verbal incontinence or wrong grammar. Take the time to write concisely, and well. There is a huge payoff if you do.

Be Honest

It might be that you are really twisted and your aim in life is to lead poor innocents on – to make them think they have made a real love connection, when in fact you are chatting with them while in your week-old pajamas in a roomful of pizza boxes and cigarette smoke. It is doubtful. Most people out there really are looking for love, or a spark, just like you. You are not going find it with a pack full of lies or exaggeration. So save yourself and potential dates some time by being honest. Advertise what you do have, not what you wish you had.

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