” A look at the most common reasons for divorce reveals a few lessons. “
When a couple falls in love and plans their “happily ever after”, they never imagine it ending in a divorce. Nowadays, one in two marriages ends in divorce. It has most people wondering if wedding vows hold any meaning in the world today. Instead of the conventional “till death do us apart,” it seems to be divorce that does most couples apart. What are the reasons that make people so intolerant? The majority end up at the divorce court for a foolish reason such as sharing household responsibilities? Where does all the love and understanding go when the couple is constantly bickering?
Do men want a wife who is intelligent and a true professional at work and a “hottie” in bed? A perfect housewife who caters to all his needs before he vocally expresses them? How about women that wish to be treated as equals? Yet shy away from responsibilities they consider a man’s job; do they expect to be romanced and to not share the romance themselves? Is it the media that portray a certain image of a successful couple? Perhaps even a primary reason that couples have expectations that cannot be met?
Top Reasons Why People Get Divorced
- The lack of understanding and acceptance of a partner because of the scarce time spent together.
- Expectations of the relationship are very high. Yet the individuals are not willing to put an effort and time into the relationship.
- Bad communication skills lead to misunderstandings over trivial issues.
- Infidelity, when a partner feels that his or her needs are not being met in the relationship. Often, in this case, looks and sexual compatibility are of prime importance.
- The desire to take the easy way out and call it quits overwhelms the tendency to fight for and work on the relationship.
The social and cultural changes that have taken place over the last two or three generations have created a wide rift in the manner in which a couple relates to each other today as compared to a couple of decades back. In earlier years, most people lived in a rural scenario where they had more time for work and family. In contrast, industrialization and urbanization have quickened the pace of life and relationships as well. Back then, choosing a husband or wife was based on how good a partner and parent one would be. Today it has to do with how one looks, sexual compatibility, and other factors, which are sure to change with time. Thus, dooming the relationship from the start. About four to five decades back, families ate all meals together and thus had a chance to interact more.
Two or three generations ago, roles in a relationship were clear: the man bringing home the bread while the woman was taking care of the family. With changes in society, men and women have become competent professionals. This caused the role-playing line to blur in the relationship. Since there is no longer any dependence, they can do without each other. Knowing this makes it easier to break off a relationship over the smallest issue. Money has also become a primary issue in a marriage. A prenuptial agreement is as good as saying that you have no faith in the sanctity of marriage or in your partner. It is evident, a divorce does not have to be the ultimate end for a marriage if the partners learn to prioritize the needs of the relationship and provide it the time, attention and affection it deserves.